Sunday, June 22, 2008

Apparently the world has ended.

Attention aspiring writers! Don't worry! You can now write a novel in no time with Novel Writing Software! Just look at all the extremely intelligently stated testimonials. Obviously this thing is being used by real pros. Brilliant literature from the mind of a single beautiful genius can't compare to a bland story augmented by the colourful additions of a $55.00 computer program!


I cannot believe anyone buys this sort of crap. It's paint by numbers for writers, only it has one of those awful cheesy websites to insist it's fantastic. God damnit. If you can't write compelling characters on your own, don't write books. If you can't figure out how to organize a time line in an exciting fashion, don't write books.

So, instead of smashing my ukulele over my head in disgust, I'm going to go out and leave small toy lemurs, and lemur-like critters, glued to messages of hope all over town so that Monday Morning Wage Slaves can feel a sparkling glimmer of lemur loveliness. I'm calling it Project Lemur, thought it's pretty meek and small-scale compared to impending projects...

5 comments:

Ryan Ferrell said...
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espionage said...

Where have I been while you have been posting 3 wonderful blog entries!? I guess on a plane to the Midwest, that's where. All of your stories about leaving treasures about remind me of my friend Kat and I driving around town in high school handing out popsicles to anyone we drove by. This was a box of 400-count pop ices that sat between us on the front seat.

I will never forget the two 8ish year old boys we drove by. One started to take it and the other flipped out, screaming "No! No! No!" with a horrified look upon his face. It occurred to us later that he thought we might kidnap him! At least the firefighters washing a car enjoyed them!

Elise of Argyle Whale said...

things like that are such an outrage to creativity!

Art by Sophie said...

lmao! you are so right in what you say! I cant write, I cant sew and I dont pretend I can. I paint. my sister brought me a paint by numbers for christmas, oh bless her. My man thught that was incredibly funny, here I am whipping out paintings and she buys me a paint by numbers! lol...she meant well!

I've got my eyes peeled for the army of lemurs! :o)

s.x

High Desert Diva said...

Project Lemur/Project Lemon...I see an interesting L movement happening.